1. When afraid

YOUR present state indicates that you are undergoing a period of purification. It is true that during such a period your heart and mind also undergo purification, so that sometimes you feel very small, as though you had no strength, and sometimes you feel afraid.

Therefore it is very necessary for you to surrender sincerely and to have full trust in the power of Almighty God. 'By surrendering and believing in Almighty God, all the things about which you feel afraid and sad will automatically disappear.

2 .... or doubting

AS Bapak always says, the latihan kejiwaan of Subud is a latihan which has the nature of a receiving; that is, we simply receive from Almighty God. For this reason, in the latihan all we have to do is just follow whatever happens.

It is unnecessary for you to feel doubt still; make your faith firm and strengthen your submission and trust in the greatness of Almighty God, for a heart that feels doubt or anxiety brings even closer, in fact, the inner temptations which cause your inner feelings always to experience darkness in receiving something that is necessary for your life.

3. or tempted

WITH regard to the lower forces which tempt your heart and mind, as you relate in your letter, this is actually your own ideas and imagination. For the complete human being is above and has control over the lower forces: that is, the material life-forces (sjaitoni), the vegetable life-force, the animal life-force and the life-force of man himself. So if you do not think about it, the lower life-forces will not influence your heart and mind. Make your feelings firm, do your latihan kejiwaan with patience and full trust in the power of the One Almighty God, because it is only He Whom you and we worship and Whose justice and wisdom we trust.

From Pewarta Kejiwaan Subud Vol. VI/, No. 1, pages 13-15.' Extracts from Bapak 's letters, 1969.

4 .... or your life is deteriorating

THE fate of a human being is such that there is indeed no one who experiences happiness without also experiencing bitterness. So there are times when one's life is improving and it is very necessary that one should not feel too happy at that time, and when things are getting worse one should not feel too depressed. So it is best if we always feel that our fate in life is just a path by which we have to go.

In order, as it were, to ensure that when our life is deteriorating the trend doesn't go on in that way, it is very necessary for us to practice prihatin. For people in Indonesia this means that they fast on Mondays and Thursdays, but for Europeans it is enough to reduce every form of pleasure and restrain themselves from eating what is delicious, from sleeping too soundly, and in particular to reduce the frequency with which they sleep with their wives. This sounds like commonplace advice but in reality it is the absolute condition for someone to achieve a state of life which is good and exemplary.

From Bapak, (letter) 17 September 1980.

5. For those who cannot receive

SOME members have the idea that they cannot yet receive. This is because they are not yet calm, not yet quiet inside. It is best to help them before the latihan begins, by asking them to say their own name, as sometimes they don't understand, they do not feel: 'Who am I', 'What am I', 'What is my self'. That is why it is best for someone to call her self, to say her own name.

So if, for example, a member's name is Anna, she can say: 'Please, God, help Anna', and then she should feel and follow what is going on inside herself. She should say this quietly to herself, not aloud. It may happen little by little so that one may have to do this often. If the person concerned cannot do this herself, then the helpers can help her by saying, for example: 'Anna, God please help Anna'. The helpers can do this for her, and gradually she can begin to do this herself, so that she will be able to know her own inner.

It is also good just to say, 'Allah, Allah'.

From Ibu Siti Rahayu to Dewan of International Helpers,2 August 1980.

REGARDING Subud members who have been in Subud for a long time but who are still not yet able to receive and feel what is called the latihan kejiwaan of Subud, the helpers should hold special latihans for them until they can really feel it. Indeed, this is the responsibility of the helpers, - who are trusted by the members and who are experienced in the kejiwaan (field of the inner force). Moreover, as far as possible, they should not just wait until they are informed; they should examine the situation of the members closely to establish which of them is still unable really to feel the latihan kejiwaan of Subud. It is also necessary that the helpers give explanations about the basis and aim of the latihan kejiwaan of Subud to anyone who is not yet really aware of it.

From Pewarta Kejiwaan Subud Vol. VI, No. 5, page 27 - (letter) 1968.

IT is also necessary to hold special latihans with those members who do not attend the latihan any more because they are not yet able to receive what is called the latihan kejiwaan of Subud. Bapak gives you this advice because there are still many members in Subud centers in many countries who do not attend the latihan because they have an insufficient understanding of the basis and aim of the latihan, and they cannot yet receive the latihan kejiwaan of Subud.

Also, by giving this attention to the members the helper will become more perfect in carrying out his duties as a helper, who is in fact the most important member in the Spiritual Brotherhood of Subud, and whose nature resembles that of an elder brother towards the members.

Furthermore, in this way the helpers will be able to take a definite attitude towards a member, once they find out whether his non-attendance at the latihan is because he really does not want to follow the latihan kejiwaan of Subud and wants to withdraw from membership. If this is in fact the case, his name should immediately be deleted from the list of Subud members.

From Pewarta Kejiwaan Subud Vol. VII, No. 2, page 29 - (letter) 1969.

6. If a member is not able to feel the latihan

SUPPOSING a member does not attend the latihan because he is not yet able to feel what is called the latihan kejiwaan of Subud, then the helpers must immediately try to help him so that he can receive and feel it as soon as possible.

The way to achieve this is by doing the same as when you open a new member; that is, by asking the member to stand in front of you, and not to think of anything but just to surrender with trustful acceptance and sincere submission to Almighty God. Then the helpers do their own latihan and surrender this brother to the One Almighty God. If there is no result when you do this, you must do it several more times, so that this brother can truly receive and feel.

Bapak would like to give the helpers some advice on this. If, while doing the latihan with a member as above, you find it takes rather a long time before he or she shows movements, do not give him or her any kind of counsel at all, and do not move his or her body or hand. It is enough in this case if you do the latihan in the way Bapak has advised above.

From Pewarta Kejiwaan Subud Vol. IX, No. 3, page 79 - relevant recording: 70 TJK 67

7. Does not feel latihan after 11 years

CONCERNING the woman who has not yet been able to feel the latihan after being in Subud for 11 years, it is most important that the helpers make her aware of Subud and the aim and purpose of its latihan.

Explain to her that the latihan kejiwaan of Subud is in truth a guidance and leading by the power of the One God, which envelops what is within as well as what is outside the self. If she has such understanding, then the matters so long buried in the imagination, thoughts, heart and mind will be freed, with the result that in her self she will feel movement from a power beyond her own desires, and that is what is called the latihan kejiwaan.

From Pewarta Kejiwaan Subud Vol. VIII, No. 6, page 1 71(letter) 1 April 1971.

8. Inner fasting

YOU must watch yourself each day and not speak badly about others or judge them or be jealous or irritated or gossip or take notice of things which are not your concern. If you do this every day then you will build up a good character. If you do this and do not allow your passions to be the boss, but correct yourselves as mentioned, this is like an 'inner fasting'.

You must love yourselves. If you love yourself you will not readily dirty yourself and you will not do those things mentioned above - like talking about other people. Your first love is to God, then to yourself, then to your husband, then to your family.

You must be thankful to God for suffering, because it means that the dirt inside us from ourselves and from our ancestors is being removed. It is better to be ill and suffer in this world than in the next. Every part in ourselves has to become clean. We always make ourselves dirty by sinning unconsciously or by sinning and not being able to stop it (for instance, speaking about other people, disliking, jealousy etc.). You must be aware of your sins. M'bakju is not afraid to die but wants to die at the right time when freed from all her sins. Before you die, you must come to being alone with God. M'bakju does not mind what people say about her - it only matters to worship God.

Patience is the key to Heaven. Without patience you cannot make progress. If you feel worried or hurt by people, or pleased if they admire you, or angry with someone or sad, this eats into your heart and makes wounds. But for Heaven you must have a whole, pure heart. So, when anyone hurts you - leave it, leave it and forgive him or her, leave it and forget it. Let it not get into you, it must remain on the outside. Inside you must be happy and untouched by it, worshipping God. M'bakju is always happy and praying inside: Oh God, forgive, forgive. And when people come with their worries, it does not make M'bakju weak, because of always praying inside to God and being happy. You must come to that.

From M'bakyu Rochanawati's talk to ladies after latihan, reprinted in Worthwood Newsletter' September 1973.

9. True jobs

BAPAK has received many letters from all over the world from members who ask what their true job should be. It is difficult for Bapak to answer these cases because, even though Bapak knows what the true job should be, if their outer is not in balance with their inner, they will not be able to do this work. So normally Bapak answers that they should try and find a job which they are able to do and for which they have studied, because really to find or receive what your true job should be, your inner and your outer should be completely in balance so that you will receive the guidance of Almighty God.

Even though at this moment you are not happy in the job you have, yet since you have done the latihan kejiwaan and you have received the guidance of God, to some degree, you should be able to adjust yourself in your job and try to do it properly; even when you try to find a job or even when Bapak advises you what your true job should be, if your outer and your inner are not yet in balance, you will not be able to do the work properly. So actually it is not necessary for you to ask Bapak what your true line or job should be.

Later on when you have developed more and more you may be able to receive for yourself what your true job or true line should be. That is why Bapak would like to advise you that you should be diligent and sincere in the latihan so that later on you will be able to receive guidance and will be shown the way to your true job and what you should do in this world.

If you are not happy in your job, for example, or the results of your work are not as they should be, it is not certain that it is because of the job, it could be that there is something wrong within yourself. So in this case it is better that you consult or discuss this with the helpers so that they may test what the reason is that you are not able to do your job properly, or that you are not happy in your job.

From Bapak's talk in Manchester - relevant recording: 76 MAN 2.

10. Helpers should not try to guide members during latihan

IT seems that there are many helpers everywhere who feel that they are required to help the members when they serve their latihan. For some of them their way of helping is to touch the members, for others ,it is by giving advice; in short, they give guidance. That is their wish.

Bapak does not say that this is wrong; indeed, Bapak confirms that it really comes from within, showing a feeling of harmony and unity among you. But there are still many among you, brothers and sisters, who still use the heart and mind in the latihan, so that such assistance from the helpers is felt as a hindrance, as an obstacle, with the result that the members are not able to receive and practice the latihan kejiwaan in peace and tranquillity.

For this reason, Bapak hopes that the helpers will not act like this any more. If it is still necessary to give advice, it is better to postpone it until after the latihan because, as Bapak has just said, there are many who still misunderstand. Of course, the helpers wish to guide the brother or sister they approach so that he or she will be able to receive quickly and well. But there are still many who feel this as a hindrance, so that their latihan stops altogether. It is the same for the helper who acts in this way when he helps others, so that during the latihan he does not receive himself. So, in fact, both parties are harmed by such behavior.

Firstly, the helper himself is harmed because he is always helping other members, so that he receives none of the development necessary for his inner self. Secondly, the person who is being guided or advised also receives nothing apart from the massaging, the touching and the advising which he or she hears from the helper. So, in fact, both of them lose. This is why Bapak asks you to stop doing this. Just do your own latihan. As far as Bapak's own behavior is concerned, Bapak never touches any of the brothers while he is accompanying their latihan, unless it is very necessary. Bapak gives advice after the latihan is finished. What is the reason for this? It may be that there is a difference between Bapak and other members and, for instance, other helpers. In accompanying the latihan of the brothers, it is as though Bapak opens a door as wide as possible or opens up a wide space, and Bapak himself only looks on. Therefore, in fact, the brothers before whom Bapak stands, and whom Bapak accompanies in the latihan, feel free. They feel as free as can be, so that they have movements like this and this (gestures). Only if there is someone who does not yet receive at all, Bapak separates him from the others. As Bapak himself acts in this way, Bapak hopes that all helpers will do the same: that is, that they will just leave our brothers/sisters alone, whatever they may feel about it.

11. Helpers correcting members

YOU ask whether 'a helper should correct another person (member) without the permission or the approval of the person who is to be corrected.

Reply: such action by a helper is wrong because in the Spiritual Brotherhood of Subud there are no regulations for helpers to act in this way. Helpers may, and should, correct a member if the member concerned himself asks for advice or correction.

You ask whether it is wrong for a helper from one center to give advice to the members of another group where he visits.

Reply: this should not be done unless the helper concerned is really requested by the group that he visits to give some advice.

From Pewarta Kejiwaan Subud Vol. V, No. 2, page 47 - (letter) 1 September 1966.

12. Problems caused by some members' life styles

IN response to the problems caused by the personal life styles of some members, Siti Rahayu said the helpers really could not do anything to stop them from their actions, or ask them not to come to the latihan. The only thing that helpers could do was to try and explain, in a kind and gentle way, that these actions might prevent them from making spiritual progress. The best they could hope for in the latihan was to throw off-some of the dirt they accumulated by these actions, but that they might go around in circles and not be able to progress spiritually.

From Ibu Siti Rahayu (letter by Sharif Horthy), 4 January 1979.

13. Homosexuality

THE latihan kejiwaan is guidance and training from the power of God which we receive whenever we surrender to Him, free from the influence of the heart and mind. As a result of the latihan kejiwaan sins and faults which are hidden deep within our being are brought to light in order that they may be cleaned out and put right. These are things which we may not have been aware existed within us.

It is necessary that we should become aware of these faults within us during the process of purification. Only what is most important for you is that you should not follow or act out the temptations you are experiencing, which are just part of the purification process.

This is because homosexuality is not allowed by religion and is not allowed by God. It is a misuse of the body which not only harms a person physically but harms the jiwa in a way that is very difficult to put right. Therefore, you must be very firm in avoiding such conduct. To lighten your situation the only way possible is to do the latihan with a full feeling of trust in and surrender to the greatness of God Almighty, for He is able to correct those things within us which we are unable to put right.

From Bapak, (letter) 5 May, 1976.

ACCORDING to your letter, you have acknowledged the wrongness of your behavior in practicing homosexuality. This confession of yours shows that you are able to feel and consider that it is not good for a person to practice and make a habit of it. Since this habit has its source in the desires and passions, you should really and truly prevent this desire of yours. And in order to strengthen your will to prevent this passion, you should marry Miss A. straight away, as you said in your letter. Only, the important thing is that it is necessary to remember that after you are married you should not think of the past any more, but from now on do the latihan kejiwaan with full submission and trust in the power of Almighty God so that you may be kept from a low and accursed act or habit.

If you can act in this way, it means that you will be kept from your low behavior and habits, and you will be approached by an atmosphere of life that can open the way towards happiness and excellence.

From Bapak, (letter) 3 October 196 7.

14. Spiritual experiences

WHAT you have experienced were spiritual experiences, although these experiences are still concerned with growth or development, meaning you are not yet completely free from the lower forces; that is, your thinking and imagination. For if those experiences were received by the capability of your jiwa, then the experiences would be received with consciousness or awareness and understanding, so that these experiences need not be analyzed or interpreted, because in this matter it only remains for one to receive, to be aware and to benefit from them.

Indeed, one person's experience is not the same as another's. Therefore one cannot interpret the experiences of someone else because the experiences that have been received are different from those of the one who is being asked, although this has as its source one power: that is, the power of the One Almighty God. This comes and goes according to His grace and will.

From Ibu Siti Rahayu, (letter) 26 January 1980.

15. Member disturbed by deceased relative

CONCERNING your experiences, they are related to the death of your brother who died because of an accident. Therefore, in fulfilling spiritual needs, we who are still alive may pray and do something good (such as holding a selamatan) in order that the soul of the deceased does not disturb or approach those who are still alive, but can be in a place that is willed by the One Almighty God.

Perhaps for those who are not yet in Subud, this is only something like a symbol, but because you already do the latihan, of course your jiwa can feel something which is not in its place.

It is best if you make an effort at some time to invite Subud members to do latihan at your house (men first, then women). Afterwards eat a little, as at a selamatan, with the intention of praying that the soul that has passed away can go to the place it should.

If you can be brave, each time there is something strange, it is sufficient for you to be quiet as in the latihan, but within yourself mention 'Allah, Allah' (God, God protect me). Gradually, when you become strong outwardly and inwardly then that which is not good will go away by itself. We trust that the Subud members there, especially the helpers, will be prepared to help you.

From Ibu Siti Rahayu, (letter} 12 August 1978.

16. Donating or receiving organs

THE question: In my country everyone must indicate on his driver's license whether or not he agrees to be an organ-donor in the event of a fatal accident. One has the choice to refuse, to give only part of his organs or to give his whole body to medicine and research. Is it right spiritually to give or receive organs and to give or receive blood?

The answer: The question which you have put in your letter is in fact too deep to answer. Put briefly, looking at it from the point of view of the kejiwaan, the transfer of parts of the body from one person to another is determined by the power of Almighty God, so that it is not possible for man to determine its rightness unless he has been able to receive for himself the permission of Almighty God.

If we now look at it from the angle of science as understood by society, then indeed it can be useful although it cannot be ascertained for sure whether it will be successful in a given case. Nevertheless, to some extent there is evidence that in certain cases it can be successful.

Therefore, if we are to decide the matter based on the view of the science of human society, in that case Bapak simply leaves it to file interested parties. In other words, does the one who donates the organ feel truly willing, submitted and surrendered, no matter what the results may be? And is the one who receives willing to receive it, and willing to accept whatever the results may be, whether they be good or bad?

From Bapak, (letter} 6 August 1980.

17. General advice

I CANNOT give you much advice concerning your family. But I believe that if you do not forget your worship of God and truly have a feeling and act as a person who is responsible, there will come about as good a solution as possible.

You should also try to wake up early in the morning and pray as if you were doing latihan and ask God for His protection and guidance, for it is God Who is All-Powerful, Who can change and make something that is not good into something that is good, and something which is out of place to return to what it should be.

From Ibu Siti Rahayu, (letter} 17 April 1980.

18. Stand on your own feet

YOUR experience of feeling close to Bapak, of feeling that you have obtained guidance from Bapak is true. Only you should be able to distinguish between and to separate from Bapak who has obtained the gift from the power of the One Almighty God, who guides us to obtain contact with the power of God, and Bapak as a follower of God as a human being such as you.

Therefore, Bapak does not wish us always to depend upon Bapak, but we must learn to stand on our own feet, beginning in the life in this world until later in the life after death. In your worship of God, there is you with the power of God, while Bapak is only as a pioneer who opens you and gives the way to God.

From lbu Siti Rahayu, (letter) 24 October 1980.

19. Sending problems or questions to Bapak

HELPERS are advised not to send any problems or questions to Bapak direct. The problems they cannot solve should be sent to the Regional, National and then International helpers, as they have the responsibility to send problems on to Bapak in case they cannot be solved by the helpers.

From the Dewan of International Helpers with lbu Siti Rahayu's approval, 2 August 1980.