"It Is God Who Creates You... And Takes Your Souls... At Death...

And Of You... There Are Some... Who Are Sent Back... To A Feeble Age... So That They Know Nothing... After Having Known Much...

For God Is All-Knowing... All-Powerful...

It Is God... Who Brought You Forth... From The Wombs... Of Your Mothers... When Ye Knew Nothing...

And He Gave You Hearing... And Sight... And Intelligence... And Affections...

That Ye May Give Thanks To God..."

From The Holy Qur'an

Special Requirements... For This Submissive... SUBUD Soul's Specific Episodes... Of Writing... Commanded... Directed... And Monitored... By Her Creator... Her Beloved Heavenly Father... Allah Almighty God... According To His Perfect Will For Her... His Ever Loving Daughter...!

Muftiah earnestly beseeches... of her Creator... that every time... she Is Commanded By Him... to write her life/SUBUD story... whether... as initially... by long hand... or by sitting up in bed... with her laptop computer... which her beloved husband... Farlan... recently Was Guided by Him... to obtain for her... her Beloved Heavenly Father... Allah Almighty God... Will Guide her... to carry out His Commanded Assignment... According to His Perfect Will... for her...

She asks this of Him... with a feeling inside her... of patience... humbly submitting herself... in sincere surrender... to The Divine Power... Of His Great Holy Life Force... in this endeavor - the SUBUD Way... to the best of her... as yet... still very imperfect ability - Insha Allah... God Willing...

A very pleasant Good Morning to you... her hopefully many readers... (whom... while re-editing this Spiritual Odyssey... for the very last time... today... on this memorable Sunday... July 19th... 2009... at 4.16 a.m.... being her dear brother Remo's date of birth... - may he live Blissfully... in the Glory... of his Afterlife... - this humble to God SUBUD soul... at the age of seventy-nine... and blind in one eye... can refer to all of you... as specially Blessed... Chosen by God souls... who Have Been Led... here... to the recently set up Holy Website... titled "SUBUD Stories..."... by Specially Assigned... Angels of God...)

Getting back... to the original writing... of this soul's Spiritual Odyssey...:

This trying to be humble to God... submissive to Him... SUBUD soul... Blessed by her Creator... as Muftiah... for the past eleven years... and in her fifty-fourth year... of living on the planet earth... and in her twenty-third year... in SUBUD... has just spontaneously Received... the Latihan Kejiwaan of SUBUD... which is her sole Holy Way... of worshipping... her Beloved Heavenly Father... Allah Almighty God... According to His Perfect Will... for her... ever since she was in her thirty-first year of life... having recently moved back... to living in Johannesburg South Africa... from Southern Rhodesia...

It is 8:30 a.m... on the 13th day of March... 1984... and it seems... that she is to continue sharing herself... with all of you... her dear kindred brothers and sisters... throughout this ever increasing... chaotic... violent world... of ours... Lovingly Given to us... by our Creator... and which we... over the long centuries... have so vilely abused...

Twenty days ago... Muftiah's weak heart rate... with her... for most of her life... having been prone... to alarming bouts... of a most unpleasant affliction... diagnosed as "Paroxysmal Tachycardia"... (the medical term for which... she only found out about... when she was well into her thirties... and quite by accident...! ... and always having suffered the no name of them... in silence... ever since she was eight years old...!) ... suddenly increased... erratically... and alarmingly... to way above normal...!

And three days later... she was Commanded... by her Creator... to go on a twenty-four hour... Water Fast... for a period of seven days... after which... a little food... was allowed at night... but the God Commanded... "Now Water Only" Fast... during the day... and food only at night... Still Continues....!

Furthermore... her beloved husband... Farlan... of only seven years... after which... Almighty Allah... Abruptly Ended... their sexual union... for good... shortly before the very first... of His Willed Strokes... has been Receiving... about his own future life... which does not include her...!

For he is to marry again... and his future wife... is none other... than Muftiah's little... beloved "itoko" (cousin)... Isnaini... from her previous Japanese incarnation... the two of them... having become... joyfully reunited... once again... in this lifetime... through SUBUD...!

And Muftiah herself... has Received... that her husband and Isnaini... were the perfect mates... for each other...!

Shortly after their joyful reunion... the two kindred in Spirit cousins... both Received... the date and time... that Muftiah... Would Be "Dying of Stroke... on October 28th...1982... at 4 a.m. ..."!... Which Momentous Event... Came To Pass... just as Received by them... independently of each other... Isnaini... at her place of work... at the Japanese Bank... and Muftiah... in her newly moved into apartment... in Daly City...!

And Farlan... had the most Perfect Receiving... about Isnaini... his "perfect mate" ... and himself... namely...:-

"Lovers... Honeymoon... Hawaii...!"

Muftiah... lying in her sick-bed... experiencing one God-Willed Stroke... after another... would also Receive... "Baby Boy Coming...!" ... every now and again... this in addition... to her usual Receiving... about "Dying of Stroke... In Full Awareness..."... and she would have a strong feeling... inside her... that they would be exchanging places... for the "Baby Boy"... is destined... to become Farlan and Isnaini's son...!

After the first God-willed Stroke... Muftiah's dearest SUBUD Sister... Lilijana... whom she lost... through willfully disobeying her Guidance... for the very first time... as Muftiah... told her... that she had asked about Muftiah's unique situation... and Received... that she had asked... for a "Test Of Patience..."!

If she did ask her Creator... for such an Experience... it must have come from her Jiwa... (Inner self)... and most certainly not... from her conscious will...

Because she has always tried... to be patiently surrendered... to God's Perfect Will for her... for He Knows her... far better... than she knows herself... and Knows exactly what she needs... and when she needs it...

Being born... close to her Inner self... and remaining so... as being a despised... by her mother... embarrassing love-child... born in adultery... and mostly ignored... nobody had ever bothered... to tell her... about the Mighty Existence of God...!

And yet... she was very much aware... of His All Powerful Existence... inside her being... ever since she can remember... from her earliest beginning... living in Japan... patiently awaiting... her Beloved Heavenly Father's Will... for her... from day to day... always striving to be... and behave... as He Would Have His loving daughter be... and behave...

Incidentally... she did Receive... that if her Sister Helpers... did Latihan with her... regularly... three times a week... as her Beloved Bapak... had specially set up for her... with his usual "recommendation" ... her going... would be "Pushed Forward"... but this has not happened... as yet... the conflict arising... whether a Sunday... was the second... or the third... Latihan...!

So it seems... as if we are all being Tested... at this time...!

And so... as usual... Muftiah's humble to God Jiwa... (Inner self) ... has been patiently waiting... now for almost twenty-seven years... as... in re-editing this... her Spiritual Odyssey... for the very last time... today... on July 19th 2009... she is still... sincerely... and patiently... and unconditionally... surrendering herself... to the Perfect Will... of her Beloved Heavenly Father... Allah Almighty God...

Unconditionally surrendering herself... to her Creator... meaning... that she will neither hope for... nor pray for... nor expect anything... in particular... for herself... from Him... except that His Perfect Will... Be Done Unto her... His ever loving daughter... for He Knows her... far better... than she knows herself... and Knows Exactly What she Needs... And When she Needs... Whatever He Wills... For her To Have...

And now she is Spiritually... forty-seven years of age... since Being exceedingly Blessed... by the Miracle of SUBUD... when in her thirty-first year of life... she was Gloriously... Inwardly "Opened..." ... and "Awakened..." ... to Receive... The Great Holy Life Force of Almighty God ... Which ever since... she Has Been Feeling... inside her being... like a Gentle Vibration... and Which Has Been Guiding... and Directing... the moments of her life... Perfectly...

That is to say... unless she defiantly... and willfully followed... her absolutely convinced... that she was right... reasoning... which always turned out... painfully wrong... and the fickle dictates... of her never truly satisfied... French/Italian... romantic heart...!

Which... she is ashamed to confess... as you will be reading... in the pages of this... her Spiritual Odyssey... she has done... quite a number of times... and always... to her enormous regret...!

To give you a little example... of how her Loving Creator... her Beloved Heavenly Father.... Has Been Monitoring her life... from her very beginning... here... often for her... Hell on earth... even Giving her... her very own Guardian Angel... to Protect her... and Who Conveys God's Perfect Will for her... by Whispering... into her right ear... ever since she was four years old... when He Rescued her... from being kidnapped... for the lucrative... Oriental Sex Slave Trade...!

For instance... there were the Momentous Occasions... when her Heavenly Father... even Paralyzed... her whole body... not just once... but three times...!

The very first time... was when she was about twenty-five... and newly arrived... as a stranger... in Salisbury Southern Rhodesia... from South Africa... to continue being... His most willing channel... for Divine Healing... the total God Willed Paralysis... Occurring... while she found herself... lying all alone... in a set up... too short cot... in a large... piano store showroom... because there was no other accommodation available... for her... in the city... at the time...!

And her solitary... God Willed Paralysis... Lasted for three whole days... and nights... where she was unable... to get up... to get herself... some water to drink... nor food to eat...! And it was to prepare her... for her further Spiritual work there...!

However... the next two times... Her Heavenly Father... Paralyzed her whole body... was to Express... His Great Disappointment in her... because of her defiant willfullness... in opposing... His Perfect Will for her...!

The first Reason... for her God Willed Paralysis... was when she was about forty-two... and by the Grace of God... still looking twenty years younger... because she had allowed... her unfaithful husband... who was living in bliss... with his passionate... Argentinian lady love... in Miami... to divorce her... against God's Perfect Will... Conveyed to her... as usual... by her lifelong... Guardian Angel Friend... in her right ear...!

And just as her Heavenly Father... Was Letting her know... that He Was Deciding... whether to let her die... then and there... in a State of Disgrace... the locked door... of her San Francisco apartment... had burst open... and her dear SUBUD Sister... Rosada Cantrell... with the Power of God... Blazing Forth... from her being... Had Come Flying in... with the Command from God... to rescue her... from the evil city... which was ruled... by the satanic forces...!

And the third... and last time... her Beloved Heavenly Father... Paralyzed her whole body... for about five... excruciatingly long hours... while Making her Experience... the horrible Stink of Pig... Oozing out of every pore... of her now... exceptionally long... six foot two body... was when she was about forty-three...

And while He Kept her whole body... in a State of Utter Paralysis... He Reminded her... that she was Being Punished... because she had eaten... of the unclean flesh... of the pig... in the form of a gift of a can of Hormel ham... given to her... which animal... one of His Beloved sons... Jesus Christ... when he walked upon the earth... Had Warned... with the Power of God... Was Unclean... to ever be eaten by humans... and which... throughout her life... Her Heavenly Father... Had Shown her... in dozens of Ways... she was Forbidden to eat...!

As Penance... for her gross disobedience... He Had Put her... into a State of Disgrace... which she felt very keenly... while at the same time... for about six months... Reducing her... into becoming a lowly paid... cleaning woman... for the Catholic church... in Santa Cruz... where He Had Banished her to... from San Francisco... and even Forbidding her... to continue... worshipping Him... in the Latihan Kejiwaan of SUBUD... nor observe the most Spiritually beneficial... Holy Month... of the Ramadan Fast...!

She finally stopped... being defiantly willful... impulsively following... the dictates... of her fiercely independent... Aries self... and always to her great detriment... when He Renamed her Muftiah... at the same time... Commanding her... to no longer address Him... as her Heavenly Father... or Almighty God... but only Almighty Allah... worshipping Him... as a Muslim... but only Inwardly... and not to study the religion... with her impure heart and mind... which meant... at all times... being submissively obedient... and unconditionally surrendered... to His Perfect Will for her...

And then Commanding her... at forty-five... to marry... a twelve years younger man...! ... and Beginning her life... to date... of "Now Inner Life Only... No More Outer Life..."! ... and still Keeping her married to Farlan... but in name only... who... for the past twenty-seven years... has been taking excellent care of her... his sickly... much older wife... who... by the Grace of God... still looks years younger... with never a complaint...!

He... Farlan... Perfectly Chosen... for Muftiah... by her Creator... is a very rare... very noble soul... indeed... who continues to live a life of celibacy... and for whom... she can never express... in mere words... how very grateful... she is... to him...!

And she finally... at long last... began to experience... a life of Inner Peace... Grace... and Harmony... with all those around her... as the moments of her life... continued to be Guided... and Directed... by the Power of the Great Holy Life Force... of her Loving Creator... her Heavenly Father... Allah Almighty God... which... ever since she was thirty-one... she constantly Feels... like a Gentle Vibration... inside her utterly surrendered to Him... being...

So... at seventy-nine and three months... old... physically... and shrunk to five foot nine... she sits in her wheelchair... with the constant pressure sensation... of varying degrees... of a "baseball"... in her head... due to the many God-Willed Strokes suffered... over the years... (she stopped counting them... after the thirty-seventh...!)... with her wonky heart... now complicated even more... by the medical diagnosis of... "mitral valve prolapse"... daily acting up again... squinting... with only the use... of her left eye... since her right eye... has become totally useless... for the past twelve years or so...!

And she... as Muftiah... writes... only when Commanded... by her Beloved Heavenly Father... Allah Almighty God...!

Whenever He Wills... that she share her extraordinary... turbulent... roller coaster life... of so many strikes against her... with her kindred in spirit... brothers and sisters... everywhere... throughout the world... a life which has also... been full of awesome... Spiritual Experiences... and Wondrous Miracles... and still is... with her ever present... Guardian Angel Friend... Assigned by her Creator... to Protect her... from all real harm...!

And the Way... in which she is Guided To Write... is quite unique... because... since her head is dead... due to the continuing... Episodic... God-Willed Strokes... she cannot use her mind... to remember something... or recall an event... in her past... Because... if she tries to... she will Experience... such an excruciating... Stab of Pain... in her head... which immediately Stops... all her thinking...!

So that all her writing... Flows Beautifully... and Smoothly... from her Jiwa... (Inner Self)... alone... as she sits up... in her sick bed... in a surrendered state... with her laptop computer... barely able to see the screen... because her eyes... immediately fill up with tears... the moment her long fingers... touch the keyboard... then are Made To Fly... over the keys...!

And before she knows it... ten hours have Whizzed By... and she has Produced... what you are reading here...!

Since for the past eleven years or so... ever since she was about sixty-eight... the prescribed beta blockers... have no longer... been of any use to her... she has had to live... with her lifelong heart affliction...!

(See also this soul's first epic... ""From The Shadow... Of The Rising Sun..."..." ... offered to you... here on the Holy Website... "SUBUD Stories..." ... describing her turbulent... twelve years of life... growing up in the Orient... mostly in Japan...

And her extraordinary saga... includes her two kidnappings... and Miraculous Rescues... by her Guardian Angel Friend... and four years.. as a permanent boarder... at the renowned... International School of Yokohama... where she... from the very young age of six... rubbed shoulders with fascinating children... from all over the world... plus her adventurous... perilous journey... from Far East... to Far West... her family escaping Japan... without official permission... and in the nick of time... on November 9th... 1941...!

As Prophesied... by an Angel of God... to this soul's musical genius... very tall... handsome brother... Error Flynn look alike... Remo... not destined... to be incarcerated... in a Japanese concentration camp... like all his Swiss compatriots were... who refused to escape... with his very wise father... Theodore Rau...!

Because Remo was destined... to share his unique Jazz music... with the world... with his style... of playing the clarinet... greatly impressing Benny Goodman... his many compositions... including a modern... trilogy opera... titled "Crista"... which got rave reviews in Europe... with most of his music composed... with artificial lungs... because of the dreaded disease of Tuberculosis... contracted... when he was only eighteen...!)

...read more in Chapter 2

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