Most Unpleasant... Physical Discomforts... And Painful Flashbacks... Of Great Remorse...!

Your kindred in Spirit... and SUBUD sister... Muftiah... has been Willed... by Almighty Allah... to undergo... a lot of Purification... besides the numerous Episodes... of God-Willed Strokes... initially... from ugly-looking... red... itchy Rashes... all over her body... increasing peculiar Pains... in her head... in addition to the usual... Monthly Migraines... for Ancestral Purification... already Begun for her... in New York... when she was as young... as almost twelve... with her very first period... and already standing... at five feet eight inches tall...! ... and strange bouts of Nausea... and Fevers...

But above all... regretting... regretting... regretting... her whole being... full of soul-wrenching remorse... as she is Shown... her often shameful... sinful life... in very rapid flashbacks...!

For instance... how proud... and disdainful... and Spiritually superior... she had behaved... as Laura... (her second SUBUD name) ... towards her second SUBUD husband... Jacques/Mark Parent...!

And then there were the worst sins of all... when she willfully disobeyed her Guardian Angel's dire Warnings... always Given to her by Him... in her right ear... ever since she made his dear Acquaintance... when she was about four years old... when He... Sent down to earth... from Heaven... by her Heavenly Father... to Protect her... Rescued her... from being kidnapped... for the lucrative Oriental Sex Slave Trade...!

(All her terrifying experiences... having to do with her three kidnappings... by the low class... muscular... "Daiku-sans" (carpenters/construction laborers) ... as well as Chinese thugs... first as a four year old... then on the day... before her fifth birthday... and again... when she was seven... and always Rescued... by her Guardian Angel Friend... are fully described... in her first book... "From The Shadow... Of The Rising Sun..."!)

Being Divinely Protected... because she was the despised... embarrassing love-child... conceived in adultery... and the cause of shameful... public scandal... for her mother-to-be... because while pregnant with her... and while blissfully dancing... in her lover's arms... his wife had shot herself dead... in the middle of the dance floor... at the Yokohama Country & Athletic Club... whilst hurling epithets... at the "Italian whore... and home wrecker..."!

And being a proud... and imperious young Contessa... the thing growing inside her... was no longer her precious love-child... but loathed and despised... and she had tried to get rid of her... back home in Italy... where her enraged husband... had banished her to... with the angry command... to "get rid of the brat...!"

But no doctor... nor even medical student... or nurse... would abort the loathed thing... growing in her belly... no matter how much money... she offered them...!

Furthermore... the loathed and despised thing... was Miraculously born... on the Holy Day of Easter Sunday... to her young... proud... imperious... exquisitely beautiful... Madonna-like... twenty-three year old... French/Italian Contessa mother... in the Turin palazzo... just after she accidentally swallowed... a bottle of lye mixture... in her ninth month... which... instead of congealing inside her... had Miraculously Reverted back to liquid... by her Dio... after she fell to her knees... begging His Forgiveness.. for having tried to kill... her unborn baby...!

And the cry of "Miracolo..." ... which swept throughout the land... had generated many well-wishers... and newspaper reporters... from all over the world... coming to the palazzo... to Bless the mother... and her Miracle baby... naming her "Graziella..." ... meaning "Little Grace of God..."!

This naughty "Little Grace of God"... willfully... and defiantly... Disobeying Her Guardian Angel... which actually meant... that she was disobeying... her Beloved Heavenly Father's... Perfect Will for her...!!!

Not just once... but three times...!!!

The first time... she willfully disobeyed... even arguing with Him... was just after her twelfth birthday... when He Warned her... not to wear her favorite... New York pink angora sweater... which showed off her budding breasts so prettily... to her very first day... at a Swiss school... in Zurich... having recently arrived there... from Japan...!

That disobedience... earned her... now standing at five feet eight inches tall... for two years... being chased around the classroom... every week day... after school... by her six foot two... lustful... handsome young... blond... uniformed... Nazi school teacher...!

And from whose amorous clutches... her Guardian Angel... always Rescued her... by not only Giving her... the Superhuman Strength she needed... to fight him off... but also by Unlocking... the locked classroom door for her... so that she could make her escape... greatly puzzling her frustrated teacher... who was positive... that he had locked it... behind him...!

And with her school teacher... being constantly thwarted... he had turned the class against her... labelling her family... as foreign enemy spies... which resulted in having stones... viciously thrown at her... by her ignorant... gullible male classmates... every day... on her way home from school... with her Guardian Angel... always Making sure... that none of the stones... ever found their mark... as she... with pigtails flying... ran like the wind... with His Help...!

Interesting to note... it seemed as if her young... lustful school teacher... Was Being Punished by God... because years later... in fact... on the very eve... of her scheduled abortion... over which she... at twenty-three... was in agony... now living in Johannesburg South Africa... she got a letter from him... begging her forgiveness... because ever since... she went out of his life... he had been plagued... by accusing images of her... above his head... every single time... he lay down on his bed... to go to sleep... hence... never able... to get a good night's peaceful rest...!

And that disobedience... caused her a penance... of enduring three years... of a most unnatural... poignantly sad... so-called "marriage"... which was never consummated... because her younger giant... of a husband... with a heart... as big as the ocean... kept her high up... on a pedestal... and refused to sully her... with his dirty... unclean self...!

(Their very sad relationship.. which finally ended... when he tried to kill her... is fully described... under Part IV... titled... "The Poignantly Sad... Tragic Saga... Of Brian And Nadia...!")

And the third... and last time... she disobeyed her Guardian Angel Friend's dire Warning... and which earned her... known as Laura... losing the job she loved... in Miami Florida... working for a naturopath/Chiropractor... and her apartment... and loaned car... which she loved to drive... having just learned to ... the year before... and suffering two bad injuries... was when she was about forty-two... when she signed her husband Mark's divorce papers... against God's Will... with her Guardian Angel Friend... Warning her... in her right ear... "Do Not Sign!"... Uttering the exact same Words... of Warning... as on her doomed wedding day... with Brian...!

Despite the fact... that Mark was already blissfully living... with his new... passionate... Argentinian lady love... and Laura was very happy for them...

For still suffering... from a deep seated sexual trauma... ever since she was brutally... sexually assaulted... by a handsome... young... German Prisoner of War... when she was a sensitive... head in the clouds... with always one foot in Heaven... young virgin of seventeen... living as a student... in England... she could never make her husband... quite happy enough... in bed... during their three years... of a God Commanded... SUBUD marriage... living in the tropics... on the romantic... Caribbean island of Antigua... their turbulent marriage... fully described under Part II... titled... "The Turbulent Saga... Of Jacques/Mark... And Grazia/Laura...!

And the most terrible sin... this soul ever committed... was when she... at the age of only twenty-three... the age her mother gave birth to her...! ... murdered... her only child... her beloved son... Marco... when his fetus... was only five months old... and which the abortionist showed her... fully formed... in a jar... breaking her heart... into a million pieces... as she recalled... distinctly feeling... the exact moment... his high soul... entered her body... on the Holy Night of Christmas Eve... as her Beloved John... poured all his love into her... thereby passing on to his darling Choochi... the oh so precious Drop... of The Water of Life...!

So consequently... for disobeying God's Perfect Will for her... one too many times... her penance... is to offer her volume of writing... to the world... absolutely free of charge... although if the truth be told... she loves to write... and does not feel... as if she is being Divinely Punished... at all...!

All the above experiences... and gross mistakes... and sins... of this trying to be humble to God soul... were committed... when she was known... at different times... throughout her long life... with varied names...!

First of all... with her Miraculous birth... on the Holy Day... of Easter Sunday... generating a great deal of publicity... from all over the world... she became named... "Graziella..." ... meaning "Little Grace of God..." ... by the news media...!

And then as a baby... living in Peking China... "Tzi-Tzi Darling"... by her adored Mummie... and "Darling Nadia" ... by her adored Papa Rau... with neither of them... ever calling her Graziella...!

As a baby girl... of two and a half... when she and her Mummie and Papa... relocated to Kobe Japan... a country already very familiar to her... from her past incarnation.... as the daughter... of a prominent ruling Shogun... and speaking fluent Hiragana... the language of the upper classes... already in Peking... with nobody ever having taught her... she was "Sera-chan"... to all her succession of village Amahs... and "tomodachis" (friends)...

Then... when she became a permanent boarder... at the ISY (International School of Yokohama)... when she was six... she was finally called Graziella... but mostly by her earned nickname... "Grazi-Longlegs"... because... being already exceptionally tall... for her age... she could outrun anybody... even students much older than herself...!

When she lived in Zurich Switzerland... from the age of twelve to seventeen... she was addressed as Graziella... by her schoolmates... but still never at home... with her Russian stepmother... calling her "Grad-zella"... in her petulant... whiny voice... which was always very irritating... with her adored/feared Papa... ever conscious of his wife's obsessive jealousy... objecting that he refer to his daughter... by a Russian name... never addressing her as Graziella... but still regarding her... as his secretly "Darling Nadia"... whenever they were alone together... which was very rare...!

When her Papa packed her off to England... for a year... for Secretarial Training... at the Kensington Secretarial College For Girls... she became known mostly as Grace... with the name of Graziella being difficult... for the English to pronounce correctly...

And when she immigrated... to South Africa... at the age of twenty-one.. to be reunited... with her adored Mummie... after thirteen aching long years of separation from her... she became once more... her mother's Tzi-Tzi Darling... and also addressed... as either Graziella... or Grace... and for four years... by the special endearment... of "Choochi"... by her beloved lover John...

And when she relocated... up to Southern Rhodesia... then Northern Rhodesia... she became known mostly by her musically professional name of Nadia...

Finally there were her three SUBUD names... where she was known as Nadia... Grazia... Laura... and finally Muftiah...

And under all the above names... she has committed sins... some of them very grave... living an extraordinary life... full of Awesome Miracles... as well... as more fully described... in subsequent relevant Parts... and Chapters... as indicated... in the Table of Contents... of both this... her Spiritual Odyssey... as well as in... "From The Shadow... Of The Rising Sun..."!)

Plus other... as yet unnamed Segments... of her volume of writing... respectively...

...read more in Chapter 3

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