How Newly Married... Farlan And Muftiah... Are Shocked To Learn... That They Are Not To Become... Regular Members... Of A SUBUD Group... As A Married Couple... Just Like Everyone Else...! Because Their Creator... Almighty Allah... Has Other Plans... For His Loving Daughter... Muftiah...!

Although she had already been married three times... before Farlan... the last two... being SUBUD marriages... her last two husbands... never became regular Members... of a SUBUD Group...!

Because her first SUBUD husband... being a hotelier... due to his hours... in the hotel business... was attended to privately... by his fellow SUBUD Brother Helpers...

And her second SUBUD husband... due to the fact... that they were isolated... from any SUBUD Groups... when he was transferred... by his employers... RCA... to the Caribbean island of Antigua... soon after he was "Opened"... in South Africa...!

And this is how thirty-three year old Farlan... and his forty-five year old wife... Muftiah... who... by the Grace of God... still looked twenty years younger... learned of Almighty Allah's Particular Plan... for them... His adoring children... as willing players... in His Little... Dramatic Scenario...:-

During the long drive... from their lovely town house... on their way... to Santa Cruz SUBUD House... for their very first Group Latihan Kejiwaan... together... as legally husband and wife... Farlan was beaming... for a change... instead of criticizing... and picking fights... with his mate... as he had been doing... for the past few months... ever since they had slept together... only once... before marriage... causing their most unpleasant... what became termed in SUBUD... as... "Speeded Up Purification...!"

His continuous fighting with her... was also exacerbated... by the painful circumcision... he had Received... to undergo... just a month before their marriage... hence frustratingly... unable to consummate their legal union... yet ... ever since Almighty Allah... Had... Very Uniquely... Brought Them Together... Jiwa To Jiwa... (Inner to Inner)... practically as strangers...!

And now here he was... her twelve years younger... tall and slender... noble looking... handsome husband... with his blondish brown hair... and greenish-blue eyes... shining with pride... telling his youthful looking beloved... how happy he was... that he now had a wife... who... so utterly devoted... to her Creator... her Beloved Heavenly Father... Allah Almighty God... for all her life... was known... to never... ever... miss a Group Latihan...!

So proud of her... because she never allowed herself... to be distracted from attending... by... for instance... a particular movie... that was being shown... for the very last time... on that particular Latihan night... or a one-time concert... that happened to fall... on a Latihan night... etcetera... etcetera...! In short... praising her wonderful "SUBUDness"... to the skies...!

And as she sat next to him... on the long 45 minute drive... her mouth open... in sheer amazement... listening to him babbling on... happily... about how wonderfully SUBUD... he thought she was... she tried to ignore... the sudden feeling of Queasiness... in her stomach... and peculiar Shooting Pains... along her long... now six foot two spine... making it very hard for her... to feel relaxed... and at ease...!

Emptying her mind... of all disturbing thoughts... and stilling the emotions... of her heart... and relaxing her extra long body... as much as possible... while driving herself... to Group Latihan... was Muftiah's usual habit of Preparation...

So that... by the time she arrived there... she would already be... in a very quiet state... for the scheduled fifteen minute... Quiet Period... before the Glorious half hour... of Blessed... unconditional surrender... to her Creator... her Beloved Heavenly Father... Allah Almighty God... through the Latihan Kejiwaan... of SUBUD...

"Unconditional surrender"... to the One Who Created her... meaning... that she neither prayed for... nor asked for... nor hoped for... nor expected anything... in particular... for herself... from Him... but only that God's Perfect Will... Be Done Unto her... For He Knew her... inside out... and far better... than she knew herself... and Knew exactly... what she needed... and Knew when... it was the right time... for her to be Blessed... with something wonderful... that He Willed... for her to have...!

For ever since her Beloved Bapak's memorable visit... to South Africa... in 1966... during her fifth year in SUBUD... when he told his SUBUD children... about the extra advantage... SUBUD people had... over other esoteric practices... in being able to stay close... to their "Opened..." and "Awakened..." Jiwas (Inner selves)... and that they should do so... as much as possible... she had very seriously... taken this Holy Man of God's advice...

And since she was brainless... anyway... she had been practicing... staying close to her Jiwa... as much as she could... ever since... trusting her Inner Guidance... far more... than the dictates... of her fickle heart... which was never truly satisfied... and "dumb cluck" brain... which her stepfather... Papa Rau... becoming exasperated with her... had so often called her...

By the time... Farlan and Muftiah... reached SUBUD House... however... as she gingerly stepped... out of their car... the strange Attack of Nausea... and Back Pains... Suddenly Ceased...!

And she duly went... into the Ladies Latihan Hall... and after the usual fifteen minute Quiet Period... Experiencing her usual... thirty minutes... of Joyous Latihan Kejiwaan of worship... while Receiving... to Blissfully Sing Praises... to her Beloved Creator... she began to have... an ever so slight Feeling of Awareness... that she actually did not belong there... with all the other SUBUD ladies... who had all been intimately known to her... for at least a year... as her dear SUBUD Sisters... when she lived there... a year and a half earlier...!

During the second time... they drove together... to Group Latihan... a few nights later... as Farlan again... praised her "SUBUDness"... to the skies... instead of fighting... and arguing with her... as he had been doing constantly... in the interim... the same thing happened... only this time... the painful Twinges... were a little bit more severe... making it very difficult... for Muftiah... once again... to feel totally relaxed...!

However... just as the last time... as soon as they got out of their car... her peculiar odd Pains... had Vanished...!

But this time... during her Miraculous... Group Latihan... with her fellow SUBUD Sisters... with whom she had always felt... a warm Inner rapport... she had an even stronger Inner Feeling... that she was not supposed to be there...!

And as they drove home together... afterwards... Muftiah found herself wondering... whether she had felt so strange... and out of place... because it had been quite a number of years... since she had attended a Group Latihan... as a married lady... being used to going to Latihan... as an independent... single person... Perhaps it made a difference... in the Inner Feeling...!

On the third Group Latihan night... however... the Pains... in her body... were so Severe... that Farlan became aware... of his wife's agitated state... as... sitting beside him... with her eyes... welling up in tears... she tried not to moan and groan... too loudly...

But she could not... for the life of her... burst his exuberant bubble... by asking him to drive them back home... not when he was under the happy impression... that she was such a regular attendee... loath to let him know... about what had transpired... the previous two times... So she brushed off her peculiar Pains... as a possible attack of indigestion...!

And just as on the first two occasions... as soon as she stepped... out of their car... the excruciating Pains... Raging throughout her body... for the whole 45 minute drive... abruptly Ceased...!

But on this third occasion... about five minutes... into her Latihan... as Muftiah stood quietly... as usual... with her eyes closed... sincerely submitting herself... in patient... unconditional surrender... waiting for the Power Of God's Great Holy Life Force... To Vibrate... Even Stronger... Than Usual... inside her... and began to Receive... her usual Singing of Praises... to her Beloved Almighty Allah... Accompanied by Graceful Bodily Movements... she suddenly had the wind... taken out of her sails... by feeling a Violent Push... against her back...!

And the next thing she knew... was finding herself... standing outside... in the hallway... of the Ladies Latihan Hall... with no idea... how her large... roomy... shoulder tote bag... was clasped in her left hand... and her shoes... in her other hand...!

For she distinctly remembered... before the usual fifteen minute Quiet Period began... taking off her shoes... and putting all her removed jewelry... inside her tote bag... in a special plastic bag... and placing them both... as usual... neatly under her chair... along the wall... at the far side... of the large room...!

And as she stood there... barefoot... dazed... blinking... rooted to the spot... she realized... to her utter amazement... that her six foot two body... Had Just Been Forcefully Pushed... Abruptly Catapulted... Through A Closed Door...!

And feeling utterly flabbergasted... she suddenly heard... a Roaring Voice Of Command... Powerfully Ringing in her ears... hearing only the Tail End of...:

"...And You Are To Leave... And Never Return Here... To Worship Me... Ever Again...!!!"

Now petrified out of her wits... and shaking all over... with the Voice of God... Still Ringing in her ears... Muftiah bolted... in stockinged feet... for the back door... near where the car was parked... hell-bent on getting out of there... as fast as she could...!

And throwing her tote bag and shoes down... on the passenger's seat... she jumped into the car... and started to speed out of there... as if the very Devil... was chasing after her... too terrified... to put her shoes back on... and driving off... and forgetting all about the fact... that she had a husband... and that she had come to Group Latihan... with him...!

Her husband... meanwhile... happily surrendered... in his own worship of God... in the Latihan Kejiwaan... with his SUBUD Brothers... suddenly Heard a Voice inside him... Calmly Saying...:

"Your Wife Is Leaving...!"

Which made him immediately run out of the Men's Latihan Hall... chasing after his wife... only to see her... white-faced... driving off... like a maniac... barely managing... to get into the car... with her... as she raced out of there... too terrified... to stop... for him to get in...!

And during the long drive... back home... Muftiah was still shaking... and in a daze... unable to speak... unable to tell her husband... How She Had Just Been Violently Pushed... Out Of The Ladies Latihan Hall... Into The Hallway... Through A Closed Door...!

And it was only... when they were finally back home... at their lovely town house... with her shaking and trembling... all the way... unable to speak... gripping the steering wheel... as if hanging on for dear life... she finally quietened down... when her husband... seeing how her face... was still as white as a sheet... gently suggested... that he make his wife... a nice hot cup of Bapak's Magical... Special tea...!

And in gratefully sipping... the delicious hot brew... she stopped shaking... so violently... and was able to tell him... about the Most Incredible Thing... that had happened to her... back at the Santa Cruz SUBUD House... that night...!

And as she went on... sipping Bapak's Magical... delicious tea... she was finally able to explain... to Farlan... her new husband... her most Extraordinary Experiences... of the past two Latihan Nights... ending with the most incredibly Awesome... and frightening One... of the Third... that night...!

And just as she finished... relating her Extraordinary Tale... to him... still shivering... from time to time... despite the hot liquid... warming her cold as ice insides... as the Voice of Thunder... Still Echoed inside her... and drank the last drop of Bapak's Magical tea... she Heard a Voice... inside her being... Calmly Saying...:

"Now Inner Life Only... No More Outer Life...!"

And just as Muftiah awoke... the very next morning... and recalled... once again... in sheer amazement... how she was Abruptly Catapulted... Through A Closed Door... out of the Ladies Latihan Hall... at the Santa Cruz SUBUD House... the incredible night before... she Was Reminded... once again...:

"Now Inner Life Only... No More Outer Life...!"

And that is how... Almighty Allah... Showed His loving daughter... Muftiah... in no uncertain terms... that she was to live... henceforth... in virtual isolation... from all SUBUD Groups and Centers...!

A complete Turnaround... from being in close association with them... as she had been... for the past over ten years... at least... four years in South Africa... and four years... in the USA... as Bapak's most willing Spiritual Helper... just as Bapak had foretold... would happen... during that memorable private audience with him... when he summoned her to him... at Wilgespruit... South Africa... during his World Tour... in 1966... when she was in her fifth year in SUBUD...!

Although Farlan Was Permitted... to continue to attend Group Latihan... on his own... his wife was Forbidden... to attend any...!

Allah Almighty God... Also Abruptly Halted... all her working in the world... which she had loved... preceded by Farlan's Seeing A Rainbow Shaped... Arch Of Blue Light... above her head... at the Santa Cruz SUBUD House... on the very night he Received... that he was to become circumcised... before marriage... with the Holy Words...:

No More Working In The World

Which Divine Message... greatly annoyed... her fiercely independent... Aries spirit... for she hated... to be totally dependent... on another person...!

Except for one or two Latihans... at each new place... they Received to relocate to... only to briefly get acquainted... with her new SUBUD Brothers and Sisters... at the for her... brand new SUBUD Centers... or Groups... first in Hilo... Hawaii... then Denver... Colorado... then Miami... and Tampa... in Florida...!

This unusual period... of Not Being Allowed... to regularly attend... any Group Kejiwaan Latihans... at SUBUD Groups... or Centers... lasted for about five years... until Almighty Allah... Sent His loving daughter... Muftiah... way up North... to SUBUD Seattle... in Washington...!

And that is where she served... her SUBUD Sisters... as their Spiritual Helper... Appointed by her Beloved SUBUD Father... Bapak... for the very last time... for about eighteen months... and only from her Jiwa... and never from her heart and mind... as instructed... by Bapak's flesh and blood daughter... her Beloved SUBUD Helper Supreme... Siti Rahayu...!

Her fascinating experiences there... are more fully described... in later Chapters... as indicated... in the Table of Contents...

...read more in Chapter 5

Return to Table of Contents