Bapak's Most Helpful Message... Followed By Two Years Of Suffering... One Stroke After Another...!

Beloved Bapak's reply to their telex... which arrived on the very morning... of the Stroke...! ... was as follows...:

"What is important now... is to surrender to God... in every situation...

Our return to God... is under His Authority...

Bapak prays... that God may always Be with both of you..."

Bapak's timely message... was exactly what Muftiah needed... to help her... during the long months of suffering... that followed...

So Muftiah patiently waited... for the second... God-Willed Stroke... which would be fatal... as she Was Given... her constant... daily... hourly Guidance... (sometimes every five minutes...)... that these... were to be her last days on earth...!

When she discussed with Farlan... about his still needing her... and that that might be the reason... why she had not gone... on the special "Night of Vigil" ... he quickly corrected her... by telling her... that what he had Received to say... in his surrendered state of Latihan... standing by her bedside... was to Isnaini... and not to her...!

During the first year... of one God-Willed Stroke... after another... she stopped counting them... after the 37th...! ... the lower forces... of her nafsu... would rear their ugly heads... and the plaguing doubts would come...!:

That she was not surrendered enough... was still too dirty... still too full of sin... to deserve the Divine Privilege... of Being Allowed... to return to her true Home... in SUBUD Heaven...!

Whereupon... she Would Be Made to Feel Foolish... and Off-Balance... and Chastised... And Be Reprimanded...:

"Do Not Doubt...!"

And Farlan... who was also Receiving... that his wife was dying... with the Received Words... in Indonesia Bahasa... of...:

"Istri Mati...!"

...would sometimes also doubt... as the months wore on... and she kept on living...

And he too... would also Be Chastised... by Being Reprimanded...:

"God Is Almighty... Do Not Doubt...!"

While Muftiah Was Constantly Being Reminded...:

"Time To Go Now... Muftiah...!"

Muftiah would find herself... expecting "To Go"... at 4 a.m.... at dawn... which was supposed to be... the quietest time... when the power... of the satanic forces... were at their weakest... in the world...!

And for some strange reason... on a Sunday night... perhaps because... she was Miraculously born... on an Easter Sunday...!

Miraculous... because her young... twenty-three year old... Contessa mother... had accidentally swallowed a bottle of poisonous lye mixture... in her ninth month...!

And she would prepare herself especially... on Saturday nights... trying to be as quiet... as possible... as her body weakened... more and more... with each God-Willed Stroke... which she had stopped counting... after the 37th...!

And spontaneously Receiving Latihan... and the above Words... very soon... Being Put to Sleep... by Allah... Who Would Always Say to her...

"Allah Says Sleep Now...!"

Whereupon... she would promptly Be Put Out... like a light...!

And she would be very surprised... to open her eyes... the next morning... to find herself... still alive...!

As the months... wore on... into the second year... now totally bedridden... Muftiah expected "To Go" ... during the upcoming... Holy Fasting month of Ramadan...!

For she had heard... that it was the Holiest of Times... to pass from this earth... because the hot passions... which ruled the earth... were at their coolest... (all in keeping with her own frequent Receivings... in Latihan... for the past seventeen years... of...:

"Muftiah Is Holy Now...!"

Although... if anybody happened to overhear her... she would quickly assure them... that her Receiving Meant... that she was still full of holes... not wanting to appear Spiritually superior to them... and definitely not to herself... always reminding herself... to stay humble...

And then... of course... there were the doubts... of their SUBUD Brothers and Sisters... wondering whether it was just some kind of Purification phase... that their SUBUD sister... was Being Subjected to... by Almighty God... that had nothing to do with dying...!

Or that perhaps... Muftiah had a "death wish..." ... or was in some kind of Spiritual Crisis... etc... etc...!

...read more in Chapter 47

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