In the pages... of this book... from the very outset... of what has been written... in the Prologue... the reader will see... how it was born... already begun... way back in 1953... with the shock of yours truly... known as Graziella... and Tzi-Tzi darling... witnessing the sinking... of her beloved... Dutch ocean liner... the majestic "Klipfontein..." ... off the coast of Africa... in a Pathe Newsreel... at His Majesty's Theater... in the metropolis of Johannesburg... South Africa...
The magnificent vessel... which... for about thirty days... had carried hundreds of anxious... jittery passengers... including her... and her family... to safety... across the oceans... and high seas... fraught with constant... imminent danger... of lurking Japanese submarines... battleships... and destroyers... and German U-boats... during the early part of World War II... in 1941...!
And in the ensuing PARTS... and Chapters... is described a most unusual life... of about ten years... growing up in the mysterious... exotic Orient... first for about two years... in Peking China... of which I could only write about... from what my mother has told me... since I have no memory of my supposedly idyllic life there...
But I do remember... and quite vividly... from three years onward... mostly about my growing up... in very familiar... beloved Nippon... born speaking Hiragana... the language of the upper classes... fluently... without ever being taught... and recalling several previous incarnations... as a high born court lady... and daughter of a powerful... ruling Shogun...!
Before going on any further... I would like to explain... why the body of my writing... is paused frequently... by three dots... respectively... The reason is because my nature... is that of one... who has the feeling... inside her... of a sense of an ongoing flowing... of limitlessness... into endless Eternity... and I have always hated the use of full stops... and semi-colons... which have always signified an abrupt... shocking halt to me... and I only use exclamation marks... to enhance the narrative...
In fact... during my Beloved Spiritual Father... Holy Man of God... Bapak's many Heavenly Visitations to me... he has always expressed his delight... at my use of three dots... claiming that they will slow down the reader... from his normal speedy way of reading... in wanting to absorb everything quickly...!
Bapak... as the Father of All Mankind... explaining... that since the normal pace... of one's Inner self... is slower... rather than faster... it is very necessary... and vitally important... for all the Created souls of God... to learn to slow down... in everything they think... and in everything they feel... and most definitely... in everything they do...!
In these pages... you will also be reading...for example... how...at already four years old... an attempt was made... to kidnap yours truly... for the thriving Oriental Sex Slave Trade...!
Young girls with white skin... and blonde hair... and blue eyes... were a very rare... coveted commodity... for the wealthy Chinese mandarins... and the brothels of Hong Kong... Shanghai... and Macao... and eagerly sought after... throughout the Orient... fetching the highest prices...!
Another attempt was made... to kidnap the little girl... this time successfully... by a gang of Chinese thugs... on the day before her fifth birthday... as she was walking... all alone... down the village street of "Kutsu Kake" (Put on your Shoes)... in Kobe... Japan...!
And yet again... when she was about seven... this time... right out of her bedroom window...!
And each time... she was Rescued... by her Guardian Angel Friend... making His Acquaintance... for the very first time... when she was about four... when He Whispered... into her right ear... to... "Dash Between His Legs!"... (the legs of her would be kidnapper...!)
Quickly noticing the imperiously haughty... exquisitely beautiful young mother's gross... careless neglect... of her little baby girl... her succession of village Amahs... in whose care... she was left... who all knew each other... all came up with the brilliant idea... of cleverly brainwashing... their little "ningyo"... into believing... that she was a "Chiisai Nippon no Koi Mega-Mi" (Little Japanese Love Goddess)... born to give delight... to all "Nippon no ningen" (Japanese men)... just like the Geishas... whom they were forever praising to the skies... to her...!
And at the age of already awkwardly too tall... two and a half... to about four... they would sell... her little baby body... to a variety of different... coarse... low-class... muscular... terrifying "Daiku-sans" (carpenters/construction laborers) ... meeting with them... in the back rooms... of the village shops... during the weekday afternoons...!
These to her... huge... rough... frightening... guttural men... about five to seven of them... at a time... were curious about the long-bodied... "burondo no sozobutzu" (blonde creature) ... who greatly puzzled them... because she already spoke fluent Hiragana... the language of the upper classes... and they all wanted to "torishiraberu" (examine) her...!
And after fondling her... and sticking all kinds of things into her... to their hearts' content... some of them... would even expertly slash at her... with their sharp... glittering knives... curious to see... whether the "akambo no chi" (baby's blood)... flowed... as red... as theirs did...! (She still bears the terrifying scars today...)
And all she could do... was just lie there... helplessly naked... and exposed... with her expensive... silk kimono... which her adored Papa... had brought back home for her... from one of his long... business trips abroad... opened to them...!
And frightened out of her wits... with her head... cradled in her current Amah's lap... as she stroked her long... curly golden tresses... and cooed soft reassurances... to her... she would try to endure their rough invasion... of her trembling little body... with their fingers... and their tongues... and different objects... trying to be a brave little "Koi Mega-mi"... with the seductive scent of incense... pervading the softly lit room...
And there were times... when she would even be forced... to watch them brazenly fornicating... with her current... younger Amah... after they had had their fill of her... when sexually aroused... they would negotiate terms of payment with her...!
And trembling with fear... and with her little heart... beating very fast... she would wonder... whether what she was witnessing... of the panting... and grunting... of the men... and the squealing... of the women... and their sweaty... glistening naked bodies... would become her own "Ummei" (destiny)... when they thought her old enough...!
Her succession of village Amahs... even thought... of selling her to a prestigious Geisha House... where she would have been lost... to her largely indifferent family... forever... except for her adored Papa... and her mature for her age... eight year old... motherly... beautiful... eight year old... sister Prima...!
But Papa was away... on business trips... so often... and for such long periods of time... and Prima... whom Mummie had given birth to... when she was barely seventeen... already "boy crazy"... was so preoccupied... with her latest love...!
And as far as her seven year old brother Remo... was concerned... born when Mummie was barely eighteen... he was so utterly absorbed... with his music... and her utterly bedazzling... exquisitely beautiful... enchanting Mummie... with no idea... that she was loathed and despised by her... was always going off to the Yokohama Country & Athletic Club... to play tennis...!
However... you will not be reading... about that horrendous... two year period... of her babyhood sexual abuse... in this book... because the horrible... shameful memory... Was Removed from her... by her Beloved Heavenly Father... when she was about seven years old...!
She had been constantly living... with the heavy weight of her shame... because... despite her terror... of the muscular "Daiku-sans"... there were times... when some of their nibbling tongues... had been pleasureable... as they stimulated her sensitive nerve endings...
And after undergoing... two more soul-shattering shocks... one after the other... one morning... while she was staying with her Papa... and his new Russian wife... Xenia... daughter of the famous General Bogoluboff... of the White Army... fiercely loyal to Tsar Nicholas... in their brand new... two storey house... at the lovely beach resort... of Atami... during a short school break... she had begged Her Heavenly Father... in Whom she had utter Trust and Faith... to Please let her Come Home to Him...!
And if not... then to Please Let this be... her very last incarnation on earth... for there had already been... far too many soul-shaking shocks... in her as yet... very young life...!
And her Loving... Compassionate... Heavenly Father... Had Blessed her greatly... by Heightening... and Widening... her already sensitive Inner Awareness... and also letting her Feel... that this would indeed... be her very last incarnation on earth...!
And He Granted her... a further Blessing... by Removing... from her shameful memory... all traces... of the frightening episodes... of her helpless... babyhood sexual abuse... (which she only realized... when she reached the ripe old age of seventy-two...!)
And her Beloved Heavenly Father... Had Given her the most extraordinary Revelation... by Letting her seven year old self see... the Wonders of His Creation... all around her... through His Perfect Eyes...!
And yet... she was kidnapped again... and for the last time... that very night... of her Miraculous Deliverance... right out of her bedroom window... and by the very same... handsome young "Daiku-san"... who had lewdly exposed himself to her... that very morning... and whom her Guardian Angel Friend... Had Given her outraged... seven year old self... the Super Human Strength... she needed... to beat him up...!
But you will be reading... all about her traditional Japanese custom... of sexual initiation... by the O-baa-san (village elder)... when she was about four and a half... the non-threatening memory of which... Was Not Removed from her...
The ghastly... terrifying memory... of her babyhood sexual abuse... was finally restored to her... about seven years ago... when she was about seventy-two... when her Beloved soul mate... Richard... Was Sent down to her... from their Heavenly Father... in Heaven... on a Mission... to help her remember... her frightening... sexual ordeals... gently... and tenderly telling her... that before she left earth... she would have to confront... and overcome... all the conflicts... of her life... which had been soul-shaking for her...!
And you can read... all the disgusting... graphic details... for which she asks forgiveness for... as they were painfully... wrenched out... and brought to light... from her deep sub-conscious self... in a separate segment... titled "Heavenly Visitations..." ... which also describes some very unique Heavenly Visitations... from departed loved souls... and even from her precious son... Marco... whom she had murdered... as a five month old fetus...!
And her great sin... of cowardly murder... was even more deplorable... by the fact... that she had distinctly... felt his high soul... enter her body... on the magical night... of Christmas Eve... the instant her beloved John... poured all his love... into her twenty-two year old self... thereby passing on to her... the oh so precious Drop... of The Water Of Life...!
But this book does describe... her fascinating four years... when at the age of six... with no previous formal education... whatsoever... she was sent to the world famous International School of Yokohama... with her six and five year older siblings... sister Prima... and brother Remo... as permanent boarders... associating with children... from all over the world... learning all about their countries' fascinating... unique cultures... different customs... and traditions... which hearing about... made her long to travel around the world... to see everything for herself...
Then after about a year... as a day student... at the Catholic St. Maur's Convent School for Girls... because the ISY... sponsored by the Anglican Christ Church of England... was forced to close down... with the outbreak of the War... at about eleven and a half... narrowly escaping Japan... on a Chinese junk... with her distant family... without official permission... to leave...!
In these pages... you will not be reading... about a close knit... loving family... but about a stern authoritarian father... who dealt out harsh treatment... especially towards yours truly... his secretly "Darling Nadia"... even torturing her nightly... for over a year... with the dreaded... huge... dive bomb" aburamushis" (flying cockroaches)... that she was so petrified of... because he would tolerate no weaklings... living under his roof...!
Perpetually torn... between his unexpressed affection... for his children... and his love... for his neurotic... insecure... fiercely possessive... jealous wife... whose father... the famous General Bogoluboff... of the White Russian Army... fiercely loyal to Tsar Nicholas... had never forgiven her... for being yet another daughter... instead of the son... he had so much longed for... and whose beloved wife... had died in childbirth... treating his despised daughter harshly... like a soldier boy... in various military camps... throughout Russia... thus warping her psyche... so pitifully...
Because of my Swiss father's vast import/export empire... across the Far East... he was subjected... for about three months... to being interrogated daily... by the "Nippon no keisatsu"... at their Miharashibashi Keisatsusho (Police Station)... with his family anxiously sitting... on their packed suitcases... waiting for him to come home... with official permission... to leave Japan...!
And you will be reading... all about how the Rau family escaped... leaving Japan... without official permission...! And their harrowing... four month journey... travelling from East to West... over land... and sea... with danger lurking... around every corner... and always... somehow... Miraculously avoiding it... with the terrible conditions of the War... always seeming to trail... right behind them...!
And even Appearing... To Make their ship Invisible... to the surrounding marauding... hostile watercraft... including the low-flying Kamikaze (suicide) pilots... in the sky...!
But first... there was the frightening... oh so slow... and agonizing crossing... of the East China Sea... on a stinking Chinese junk... from Nagasaki to Shanghai... where we almost got our throats slit... by the rough... excited... sing-song jabbering crew... who were greedy... for the valuables... sewn in our Russian stepmother... Xenia's clothing... before throwing our limp bodies overboard... - for dead men tell no tales...!
But Xenia happened to speak fluent Chinese... and managed to avert the murderous deed... from occuring... thus saving our lives... for the first time...!
Then again... because of her... Miraculously avoiding being blown to bits... by a bomb... placed right under our restaurant table... in Shanghai... just before the bomb went off... as we exited the crowded restaurant... filled with people... of all nationalities...!
And on and on... the narrow escapes... kept happening... usually via neurotic Xenia... of all people... who was thoroughly devoted... to her Madonna... always honoring Her... by erecting a little shrine to Her... with a lit votive candle... at Her feet... in her bedroom...
For instance... again thanks to Xenia... we almost boarded the wrong ship... also neutral... but doomed... to be torpedoed... to smithereens... with no living survivors...!
And there was even a German spy... on board the neutral Dutch ship "Klipfontein"... who almost got us torpedoed...!
Then... from a hiatus of almost three months... spent in the USA... with our passports confiscated... after almost being sent back to Japan... and certain torture... starvation... and death... in an inhuman Japanese internment camp... because of the lingering shock of Pearl Harbor... pervading the country...!
And then there is the idyllic... short interlude... in Los Angeles... auditioning in Hollywood... and meeting in person... the two contrasting... exquisite movie star beauties... Hedy Lamarr... and Ingrid Bergman... and having yours truly's voice recorded... by Warner Brothers Studio...!
And by total contrast... undergoing some horrendous experiences... in New York... from being terrifyingly mobbed... in a department store... by a thundering horde of hysterical females... who mistook five foot eight... yours truly... for the enigmatic legend... Greta Garbo...! ... to suddenly being introduced... to the shock of lesbianism...!
And then almost being killed... by an angry mob... in a subway station... because she... with her markedly foreign accent... and therefore believed to be a spy... by them... refused to buy a cheap... "Remember Pearl Harbor" tin brooch... for which she had no money to pay for...! ... and Miraculously rescued... by the sudden appearance... of her big brother Remo...! ... to being kidnapped... yet again... save for again Xenia... rescuing her stepdaughter "Grad-zella"... in the nick of time...!
Then there is the somber Atlantic crossing... and nerve-wracking... torturously snail-slow... train ride... across Portugal... and with their passports... being confiscated... yet again... being thrown off another train... in Spain... because the pompous official... refused to believe... that the odd looking... tall blonde one... of the family... was the father's daughter... insisting that she was his wife...!
This book also describes... the Miraculous rescue... by impoverished Catholic nuns... living underground... in the bowels... of the Civil War torn... blood-soaked... scorched earth... of Spain... who gave the family shelter... and precious food... they could hardly spare... after they walked for miles... on rough terrain... in the pitch black... of a freezing... moonless night... towards what they hoped... was the French border... with their passports thrown after them...!
And last... but not least... the Miracle... of finding a Swiss Information Bureau... right at the Spanish/French border... and armed with fresh... official entry papers... experiencing another nervous... unsettling train ride... across German occupied France...!
And this time... yours truly was the one... who was instrumental... in avoiding... the terribly cruel tragedy... of witnessing a horde of German soldiers... loudly stomping... in their heavy boots... onto the halted French train... looking for the "Verdammte Juden"... and roughly hauling the hapless souls... off it... never to be seen... or heard from... ever again...!
Because her Beloved Heavenly Father... In Whom she had absolute faith... and trust... Made the "Cafe Et Bistro De Pierre Chambray"... suddenly Materialize... right in front of her eyes...!
And thus the Rau family... wined and dined there... hosted by the Angel of God... "Pierre Chambray"... in perfect safety... with yours truly... being introduced... to the delicate taste of Artichokes... for the very first time in her life... and which very Cafe... Disappeared... in the light of day...!
And after safely reaching... the French/Swiss border... there is the final Swiss train ride... across pristine... peaceful... cow grazing Switzerland... to their final destination... of Zurich...
There are also several digressions... of Chapters... devoted to the Miracle of SUBUD... and extraordinary experiences... of the SUBUD Way of Life... which this ever humble to God soul... Has Been Commanded... by her Beloved Heavenly Father... Allah Almighty God... to write about...
Hope all of you specially Blessed... and Angel Guided souls... enjoy... and are enlightened... by the following pages... of almost twelve years... of a life lived... full of danger... and excitement... and even some incredibly awesome Miracles... in the Orient... mostly in Japan... and the perilous journey... across land and sea... destined for Zurich Switzerland... in the Western World...
Contessa Graziella Nadia Rau Turin...
"Little Cilandak"... Grand Bay... Alabama... USA...Sunday... August 16th... 2009... P.S. You will also find PARTS I to III... of this ever humble to God soul's Spiritual Odyssey...titled... "From Seven Hells... To Seventh Heaven... SUBUD..." ... on this Holy Website... "SUBUD Stories..."
The epic covers her continuing... most extraordinary life... full of turmoil... ordeals... and even wonderful Miracles... on the continent of Europe... being Zurich Switzerland... and England... and also on the dark continent of Africa... in South Africa... and both Southern and Northern Rhodesia...
She also lived in the Caribbean... on the tropical island of Antigua... and finally ended here... in the United States of America... where she lived in Florida... California... and Washington... and lastly here... in Grand Bay... Alabama...
Actually... all her volume of work... has already been written... for quite a number of years... but because an excellent presentation... is expected of her... by her Creator... her Beloved Heavenly Father... Allah Almighty God... she has been continually re-editing... and checking everything... for spelling errors... better phrasing... etc...
Furthermore... since she is Being Divinely Commanded... When to Write... and What To Write About... her Life Story... is not necessarily in sequence... the most important... seeming to be... primarily... to share her Spiritual Experiences... of which there have been countless many... throughout her long life... with suffering... bewildered mankind... of today... in this ever increasing... turbulent... chaotic... violent world of ours...!
And last... but not least of all... particularly to prove... to the fifty-one percent... of doubting mankind... that "God Is Not Dead"... But Very Much Alive... And Always Has Been... Since The Beginning Of Time... And Always Will Be... Throughout All The Magnificent Glory... Of Eternity...
That Is To Say... Until The Fateful Day Comes... When He May Decide... To Annihilate... All Of His Created Souls... And Everything Else... He Has Created... Throughout Our Known Universe... And Also Throughout The Unknown Galaxies... Of Other Inhabited Planets...!
As this ever humble to God SUBUD soul... knows about... only too well... from her own personal involvement... when she had her own incredible Experience... Willed by her Creator... regarding a great Destructive Force... When He Let Her Know... Obliquely... How Thoroughly Fed Up... He Was... With The Ongoing Evil Sins... Of His Created Children... On Earth... And Was About To Annihilate... All Of Mankind... With The Comet Kahoutek...!
You can read all about that Awesome... personal... Enlightening Experience... of hers... which is fully featured... under PART V... of Chapter 3... of this book...
Because... as you will be reading... in the countless pages... of her writing... about her Spiritual Experiences... her Beloved Heavenly Father... Allah Almighty God... Has Been Monitoring... and Directing... His ever loving daughter... throughout the moments... of her entire life...!
But which fact... she... as she grew older... and being considered... by her adored/feared Papa... as a worthless... brainless "dumb cluck"... and for many years... believing... that God Would Be Wasting... His Valuable Time... Concentrating on insignificant her... was not aware of...!
Such as... to give just a few examples... What Kind Of Food... and Drink... Are Not Allowed... To Go Into Her Mouth...!
As For Instance... Always Forbidden To Her... Has Been The Unclean Flesh... Of The Pig...!
When she was a young girl... She Would Be Made... To Erupt Into A Horrible Coughing Fit... the moment her tongue... touched a pork chop...! And when she... as an adult... always curious... about the taste of pork... ordered some Pork Chow Mein... in Chinese restaurants... by the time the dish... came to her table... it would be stinking rotten... every single time...!
And then there was that never-to-be-forgotten Occasion... When Her Heavenly Father... Paralyzed Her Entire Body... Because She Had Finally Eaten... Some Forbidden Ham... For The Very First Time... In Her Life... Chastizing Her... While Letting Her Experience... For Hours On End... The Horrible Stink Of Pig... Oozing Out Of Every Single Pore... Of Her Six Foot Two Long Body...!
And then there is the fact... that she has Never Been Allowed... More Than Three Sips Of Alcohol... At A Time... Because Her Heavenly Father... Will Cause The Glass... Of Her Intended Fourth Sip... To Very Painfully Nip... Her Sensitive Upper Lip... Every Single Time... Even If She Takes... The Fourth Sip... Absentmindedly...!
Her Beloved Heavenly Father... Has even Blessed her... not only with her very own Guardian Angel... To Protect her... from harm... she the embarrassing... unloved... awkwardly too tall... love child... conceived in adultery... and born Miraculously... to an imperiously proud... exquisitely beautiful... Madonna-like... adored Contessa mother... who loathed and despised her... but also with the Gift... of Miraculous Healing... Making her His Channel... To Receive His Great Power... through her Blessed by Him hands...!
And as you can see below... and on the recently established website... "MIRACOLO"... even at the ripe old age... of seventy-nine plus... she is to offer her Healing Services... once again... to all of the specially chosen by God souls... Who are Led there... as well as here... on "SUBUD Stories..." ... by His Assigned Angels...!
< R E A D M O R E >
TABLE OF CONTENTS
FOREWORD
PROLOGUE
PART 1
PART I-A
PART I-B
PART II
PART III
PART IV
PART V
PART VI
PART VII
PART VIII
PART IX
PART IX-A
PART IX-B
PART X
PART XI
PART XII
PART XII-A
EPILOGUE